Yesterday was Jon’s birthday and let me tell you – I felt bad for the poor man.

To start, both Nathan and I have bad colds this week. His started a little earlier than mine, so he’s doing okay now, but I’m still all congested, coughing and generally just NOT feeling well.

We are a pitiful mess.

So, Jon got home yesterday to a wife who won’t kiss him because she’s afraid to get him sick and a grouchy kid who didn’t nap well. We did have a few presents for him. Nathan had to help him unwrap. And since we weren’t feeling well, we decided to make dinner at home and go out for a birthday dinner sometime this weekend.

I honestly tried really hard to make it nice. I found a Bertolli frozen dinner that sounded up Jon’s alley so I wouldn’t be breathing all over something homemade, I sauteed asparagus in brown butter and garlic, I made a Pillsbury French bread loaf that I only touched after washing my hands and rubbing Purell all over them. I even had Jon’s favorite red wine and poured us glasses to go with dinner. You know – all fancy and Italian-like.

So, right as our dinner was ready, Jon reached in to get Tuesday night’s pizza box to reheat a slice up for Nathan and knocked the half-filled bottle of red wine all over the kitchen floor, shattering the bottle. It took us about fifteen minutes to get all the wine up and sweep up all the shards, maybe longer because it spilled right by the fridge, so we had to clean under there too. Meanwhile, Nathan was already in his highchair and he reached over (right as we finished cleaning, of course) and grabbed my placemat, sending my glass of wine and my glass of water all over the wall and the floor.

By this time, the bread was on the burned side, the asparagus (asparaguses? asparageese?) were pretty charred and Nathan was screaming.

Happy Birthday, Jon.

So, we finally ate dinner and we decided to do the cake part with Nathan. We (I) sang a croaky Happy Birthday, Jon blew out his candles and then Nathan had a slice of cake before bed. I lost my voice by about 8:30PM.

And I realized this morning that Jon never got a piece of cake.

🙁

Mark this year down as a fail. I’m so sorry, honey. We’ll make it up this weekend by going someplace REALLY nice.

On the plus side, Nathan and I watched Tangled yesterday while Jon was working and I was laying on the couch coughing. It is cute. I recommend it. I don’t recommend keeping red wine anywhere near a 16-month-old, however.